the black lullaby

I honestly think that bitching is one of the healthiest stress-relievers one can have. And in my industry, you learn to do it with finesse!!!

Like we’re at a party and you see two people meet from across the room. They hate each other in real life but at the party… They hug, they kiss, they ask about each other’s health and husbands… Truth is they’re sleeping with each other’s husbands. But again, it’s done so classily.

Who needs soaps when you have the Sri Lankan ad industry. I know I talk a lot about the industry I am in, like it’s the worst place to be in and like I’m being really sarcastic, but I quite like it. I mean, even the saint who tells you that you shouldn’t get caught up in the bitchfest is out there bitching about someone or the other.

Next point… Everyone is sleeping with each other. Pick someone… Pick anyone… They’ve done it with somebody’s someone somewhere down the line. What intrigues me is how everyone knows about it and pretends like nothing has happened. I tell you there’s no other industry that you can do this in.

Then we’ve got the clicks and gangs. It’s like that freakin Leonardo Decaprio movie, they’re everywhere and you mess with one of them, suddenly they’re all barking down your door and plotting your death. The best of us have been destroyed by such gangs. It’s true.

Then there are the fights! Oh those are the best. Spontaneous yet invigorating. They’re so beautiful to watch and then one thing leads to another and pretty soon, you want blood!

We also have names ranging from high end brands down to insects who don’t matter and almost everyone has a name. I was known for a long time as DRAMDON – if you break it down it means Dramatic Brandon.

You wonder how we get any work done at all. I think the creativity flows in from all these different areas and just makes magic when it comes together. Right, what a load of bullshit! But you have to admit, it might be true.

He he he.

It is that time of year once again when we dig through all the work we’ve done in the past year, looking for the best ones. When we burn too many CDs and end up throwing most of them away. When we have to get our client’s rubber stamps on forms that would be incomplete otherwise. When we start bitching about all our competitors and assuring ourselves that their work isn’t as good as ours. Yes people, it is that time of year again, when we spend a fortune on clothes that no one will notice (which is why I think I’m going to wear my torn jeans again this year) and prepare ourselves for the wicked truth that we aren’t as good as we thought we were. What the fuck is this all about? You ask…

The Chillies 2007

Since the beginning of time (that’s a bit of a stretch) the Sri Lankan advertising industry has gathered once a year to celebrate their victories over producing great advertising for brands across over 25 different marketing categories. Until the beginning of last year this award show was referred to as SLIM because it was conducted by the body known as the Sri Lankan Institute of Marketing. However, at the end of the year 2005, when most ad people in Colombo had been given the opportunity of visiting AdFest, among other international and regional ad awards, they realized that we needed to raise the creative bar in this country (what would have been more appropriate would have been to create this bar first).

Thus they rose up as one body against SLIM (I’m just being dramatic) and created The Chillies Creative Awards Festival. The panel of judges were a mixed set of local and international advertising gurus and many sessions were held around the event to give the Sri Lankan ad community a boost in the right direction.

In 2006 The Chillies was born and everyone awaited the change and to a great extent there was one. But then… as is with our culture… the bitching began once again, the agencies that had stood together to raise the (non-existant) creative bar now stood against each other claiming that each others’ entries should not have been entered and what won shouldn’t have won.

But as vicious as this industry is, these things happen because without them, we wouldn’t be who we are. So this year, after much pre-screening within the agencies, the entry-submission has begun!

Today was the deadline for Television and Radio entries. I was quite pleased because it turns out I had 14 single entries (11 from JWT and 3 from Grants) and 3 campaign entries (2 from JWT and 1 from Grants). Now I don’t know what’s gonna happen on the actual awards night, which is on the 12th of May but hopefully I’ll win something.

But getting today organized was something else. I hit the ceiling when one of my entry forms went missing and I ran downstairs to retrieve it. I walked into a room full of clients in absolute rage and as I walked through them I slipped on the floor and fell smack in the middle. I got up, found my lost dignity and went on to look for the form. They looked sympathetic the first time cause they could see I was under pressure. Then as I walked back out… I slipped and fell again! This time I’m sure they laughed… Sigh.

Shall keep you posted on the happenings. Today was so stressful just getting CDs and DVDs together. I can imagine what Friday is going to be like when we have to submit Print entries. *laughs out in mad hysteria*

B.

Ever come to that place in your life where everything is going just fine? You look around you and things are falling in place. You’ve accomplished something, you’ve made it somewhere, you’ve done something right. You’re in an environment that should grant you nothing but happiness. And you’re not happy.

I challenge the theory that sadness finds us, on the contrary I think that on many occassions, we go looking for it. Sometimes because we don’t know any better and sometimes because we want to take the risk. I suppose life would be too dull if we didn’t take that plunge, but to do it knowing full-well that hurt is all you’ll get in return… I haven’t understood when others have done and I haven’t understood it when I’ve done it.

Can we not live without the sadness and the pain? Has it become such an essential part of our lives that it is now something we can’t live without? Why do we bring these things upon ourselves?

The worst part is that no matter how many times you’ve been through the same thing, no matter how many times you’ve learnt the same bitter lesson, you still don’t think twice before moving head on into the unhappy state of affairs that await you.

And what is with that: ‘it’s better to have loved and lost’ crap? What is that? Isn’t that just another nicer way of saying that we need to feel hurt? Why?

You could come up with a million different answers and it still wouldn’t explain it.

One day during the month of December last year, I remember suddenly feeling that I wasn’t being spoken to by some people who I considered myself pretty close with. Then as I focussed on this I realized that they were actually not talking to me. I was very upset by this because I hold no personal grudges against anyone and even if I’ve told you off like a pick-pocket one day, I’d still be your friend the next because I can’t be bothered keeping things locked up in my heart, too much of a burden to carry around dude.

Anyway, I spoke to someone about this particular issue and he spoke to them about it only to find that they had apparently ‘decided’ not to like me or speak with me. Just like that. When asked if I had done something to offend them, the answer was no. When asked if they had misunderstood something someone had said, the answer was still no.

Now as silly as I was, I spent a lot of nights thinking about why this was and what had gone wrong. Then I began to understand that in this life it is in no way possible for one person to be liked by everyone. Even the nicest human being on the planet has someone who doesn’t like him.

Strange the way the mind works. You try to live your life without hurting anyone else, leaving behind a good example and still there’s gonna be some fuckwit, who doesn’t like you. It’s hard to say whether it’s their loss or your gain all at once but I do know it baffles me.

I too have decided not to like people just like that, but there’s always been a good reason behind it and it’s not because I don’t like their face.

If there are those of you who are feeling the same way out there, let it go. Being liked by someone is not up to you, it’s up to them and trying to fight it only makes it worse. The best way to deal with it is by letting it go. Holding on to it makes it become a wound inside you that will not heal and that’s pretty tough to deal with.

It was finally time to come back home and quite honestly, after a week there, I wanted to come back home. Did you know that Japanese food was really cheap in Thailand? Huh, who would have thunk it?

Anyway, we shopped again and I had Japanese for lunch, very cheap. Then we headed back to the hotel where we packed up and headed to the airport. Inside the airport I had Japanese again, not so cheap this time but still worth it.

The most important thing of all was that my mind was clear. I took this trip to think about a lot of things and you guys should understand how it is difficult to focus on anything when you’ve got so much going on in your life, which is why I needed to be away from it all.

But I had sorted things out and I was coming back home feeling much better.

In all it was a bloody awesome trip, I wanna do it again next year!!! If anyone wants to come with… I know the place like the back of my hand.

Piece of advice guys. We only start to think about life when someone close to us dies. Then we go off on this trip on how life is too short and we may never know when it is our time. Well don’t wait for your time damn it. Just do it.

If I die tomorrow, it will be with no regrets. Well a few, but those were some harsh lessons that have helped shaped my life into something better.

My boss told me that I shouldn’t have wasted my money on this trip but it wasn’t a waste to me. I’ve come a long way from believing that life is a bitch, on the contrary, life is beautiful, even when it sucks, cause it opens up so many avenues in you that you never knew existed and at the end of the day, you’re a better person for it.

I’m not asking everyone to get on a plane and go on some crazy trip or waste your money without thinking about the future… What I am saying is that when you’re given the opportunity, take it, live it and love every moment of it…

In case I never said it before, I love all you guys… (Except maybe two bitches I work with, an evil musician, one of my ex’s and a stupid client)

B.

As my adventures continued, I met quite a few people who had very interesting perspectives on life and I shared with them mine as well. We spoke, we ate, we drank and we danced merry hell. The jokes were flying around and I made quite a few myself, in a very drunken state… Although I was disappointed at how narrow minded some people got with their points of view but I never contested them because it was their right to have an opinion and believe in it.

All seriousness aside, we went on our usual stroll down walking street and had a blast… This time when we went into Tony’s we did more than pole dance, we actually got into little cages and let the entire club be enthralled by our extremely amoral behaviour! He he he…

In the meantime, my mind was also generated as to where I should go with the ending for my book. So the next day, I sat down and managed to finally finish it! Yay!

Saying bye to Pattaya was sad but muchly needed because if you overstay then you don’t appreciate the place as much as you should.

I’d like to say again that dancing in those cages were quite fun, you’d never be able to do that here now would you? It was really awesome.

Back to the book… I’m glad it’s over, I spent a year working on it and I am pleased with the end result, now let’s just hope the publisher will feel the same way… Lot more work to be done before that though…

Well I’ve got one more part of my Thai Adventure to post before I’m done… Have to go now…

B.

From the time I got on that plane I was dead set on watching 300 because I heard it was playing in Thailand. I had seen the trailers and was really impressed. Finally when we got to Pattaya we walked for like forty five minutes to this mall that we were told was three feet away from where we were. Got the movie times all wrong!

Anyway, the next day, I happened to be in the same mall and I walked up to the theatre just to check on times agaian. Turned out I was just in time for the next show. So I bought my ticket and went in all by myself ( was in a bit of a bad mood).

You have no idea how great this film is. Given, that a lot of it is based on special effects and stuff, but one cannot deny the beauty of that story that captivates you in the most surprising way.

Throughout the movie, your mind is trained to understand that love, sensitivity, feeling these are all things that make a man weak. Even the Spartan women hold fast to these beliefs and are every bit proud of it. During the journey it takes you on, you become one with the story and you see things from their point of view, you understand why the head must always be considered more important than the heart. Then at the end, you’re thrown into a series of emotions that make you want to implode but that’s all you do because your mind won’t let you do anything else.

I kept wanting to watch it again and again but whenever I tried to, something always came up…

In the meantime, I was nearing the end of my book. I was on the 35th chapter and although I knew I had arrived at the point where I should stop it, I couldn’t bring myself to do so. The story was suddenly alive and the past year I had spent with it seemed so worth it, but I knew I had brought it to it’s end and that it needed to finish so I worked towards it.

The spot I found to do my writing was something else that was out of a movie. A little table and chair made of concrete, in a deserted spot just outside the hotel with the ocean spreading out for miles just below.

I did mention a Cage somewhere didn’t I? Well that’s another tale…

B.

After a 3 hour bus ride we arrived in Pattaya… Can you say Sin City for real? But honestly it was so good to be there again. Fortunately, our rooms are ready and I’m enthralled when I walk into mine. It’s got two single beds (all for me!) and a sliding door that opens into the balcony overlooking the ocean for miles with some beautiful mountains in the distance. I think I had an orgasm just standing there checking out the view.

The rest of the room was pretty awesome too. Lovely bathroom, the works you know. So I settle down and we meet with everyone else who’s there for AdFest. Super crowd I might add.

We head out partying that night and before we know it, we’re down Walking Street – now this place has got the Sin City ambience down to a T. Hookers and Transvestites everywhere. Topless women groping men in the alleys, European women excercising their pelvis in glass boxes where you can see but not touch.

So we all gather at this bar called Simon’s. Basically like a bar court where there are many bars and many girls (some who are guys) dancing all over the place. Now I get really drunk and someone says “I think it’s time Brandon got on the pole!” So I do get on the pole. Dancing like a cheap gigollo while all my friends scream and shot and photograph me and record the whole thing on video (GOOD GOSH!!!)

After further fun is had on the pole we head on over to the club which is just across the street (and it’s not a very large street). We get into Tony’s and it’s just like you see in the movies. People dancing everywhere and every girl that walks past you grabs your dick (was kinda fun).

I’m dancing on a stage and there are so many others dancing around me and suddenly this chick grabs me (thankfully it was a real chick as I later found out) and starts dancing with me. Man we’re screwing on that stage and she’s got so much rhythm. I’m tellin you that’s the best dance I’ve had in a long time, someone who really felt the music and was not just jumping around you know. Sigh.

Coming up next… The Cage and 300!

B.

So we land and suddenly it feels good to be back in Thailand after one year, especially since when I landed last year I had three questions on my mind – am I going to win this regional contest? does the person I love really love me? will I be prmiscuous in the next one week? But this year, VACATION!!! was the ony thing on my mind from the word go.

So we land right and we go looking for the man who has our names. It was really funny since I’d never had someone pick me up from the airport like that before, you know, name on a tag and all… Anyway we found him and his name was Mr. Pytoon. He seemed like a nice enough guy to begin with but then we got on the bus and boy did he start talking. I swear you could ask him to talk to satues all night and he’d still do it for free… Turns out he’s one of those types who likes the sound of his own voice.

So we get to the hotel and – big surprise – our rooms aren’t ready yet. We decide to have something to eat and thus enters the first morsel of Thai Food into our system. Then one by one we got our rooms, checked in and the only channel that works without a problem on the tele is FTV. SUPERB!!!

The day is spent shopping, eating and shopping again and before you know it we’re back in the hotel, each contemplating if we’ll have enough money to take us through the whole week. But Bangkok is lovely and even though I can’t handle that weird road smell I’m enjoying the fact that I’m away from work and home.

We gather for an evening snack and Shehan who was in charge of grabbing some food along the way has decided to bring us deep fried Maggots, Beetles, Grasshoppers and Frogs. I tell you there was this one Frog who looked like he was just escaping the frying pan when it happened… Such sorrow.

Dinner was at a Seafood joint and we ordered these steam grilled tiger prawns, which were like huge together with some curry chicken in bazil leaves and chillie!!! YUM!

I calle it an early night cause I had to do more shopping the next dy and I was really tired. Now get this… Our bus to Pattaya was to leave at 3pm the next afternoon. I fall asleep and after what seems like hours of slumber I wake up to find that the time is 2.25!!! So I rush out of bed, jump in the shower, all the while hoping that the bus wouldn’t leave me, and I’m dressed half way when I realize that something is wrong with this picture. So I walk over to the curtains and draw them apart and – you’ll love this – it’s 2.30 AM! Ididot that I am…

Needless to say the next day was full of more shopping and I decided not to do anything wild until I got to Pattaya so at 3.30 we got on the bus and off we went… I’ll tell you more about that soon.

B.

Hello all,

I have returned… I shall write all about my adventures in the days to come but right now I have to go take care of all the loose ends!!!

You leave them alone for one week and all you ask is that they don’t fuck up!

Apparently it’s too much to ask.