the black lullaby

Remember it like it was yesterday.

Tracy sent me a text one night and asked if I wanted to join the cast of her next production – Chatroom.

I’d been away from theatre for such a long time and feeling a desperate need to get back, I said yes.

I remember the first reading I went for. I met the other five actors and I sat down with the rest of them, I felt so lost. After that night was over I thought I’d be replaced immediately cause I felt I had been really bad.

That was in November of last year.

Today, seven months later and after six, extremely memorable, performances of Chatroom, I’m finally ready to let the character of Jim go.

About Jim

In the beginning Jim was just this lonely, depressed boy who wanted to end his life. That was how I started off on him. He just loved talking a lot and enjoyed the fact that he could find someone to listen to him at least on the internet. This was during December of last year.

Somewhere in January of this year, Jim went from being verbally unstoppable to an alcoholic, this is when the glass of whisky made its way into Jim’s hand.

By the first run in February, Jim had become the kind of teenager who drank even though he couldn’t hold his liquor and then got on to the internet to ramble on and on and on.

However, as time went on and the rerun came about, Jim took yet another shape in character. He became someone who was angry and did not know how to express it. The alcohol became a support mechanism while his dormant rage was what now defined him.

I know this character inside out. What he likes to eat and drink and even what movies he likes to watch and what he likes to do on his weekends. He’s grown throughout the past seven months as a character and he’s helped me grow so much as an actor.

I’m no where near perfection but I do believe I took one step in that direction thanks to Jim. I’ve got a lot more to learn about theatre and about acting and I know I’m with the right people who’re going to help me reach that place of perfection one day but I’m happy it all started with Jim.

It goes without saying that Tracy deserves every last bit of praise for casting me in this role and having so much faith in me. And I want to thank the five coolest people I’ve ever met in a long time – Barun, Buba, Berasha, Bruvin & Behani… I blove you guys so much!!!

Thank you to the entire crew of Chatroom – you guys rock.

Thank you again to Tracy & Akhry and Mind Adventures, which I am now proud to be part of.

Thank you to our sponsors, you guys totally rock!!!

And thank you to our beautiful audience, it’s been a pleasure entertaining you.

That being said… Goodbye Jim, it’s been good, its been great, it’s been one hell of an experience and I’ll carry your memory with me always.

Brandon.

Four months after the initial run we’re back again for yet another run.

This time round Cork’s Bloody Opinionated finds its home on the stage of the Punchi Theatre in Borella. Starting tonight, till Friday – Chatroom begins at 8pm and is approximately a 1 hour performance directed by Tracy Holsinger.

Tickets are available at the venue on performance nights.

Arun, Subha, Erasha, Ruvin, Tehani and I would love to see you there.

Chatroom is a Mind Adventures Theatre Company production.

I think it’s safe to say that I’ve had one of the best weekends ever. But through all the fun and excitement, there were the times when the mind was left to wander. Soon I settled on the topic of deception and how often it happens in our lives and how often, we are the ones behind it.

It’s easy to point the finger at someone else and say: “they betrayed my trust!” or “I never thought they’d do this to me!” or “how could you deceive me this way???”

But isn’t it really hard to admit: “I deceived someone… I lied… I cheated… I played dirty… I manipulated the situation to my advantage.”

Truth is good for the soul and while you’re facing all of the truths in your life you shouldn’t be ashamed to embrace the darker side of it as well.

We’ve all done the unspeakable and yet we’re hurt when someone returns the favor.

For the first time on Friday, I admitted something that I had, till that point, only admitted to myself. The truth is that I am the sort of person who would go to any extreme, sink to any level, to get what I want. It’s a horrible thing to say about myself and it’s horrible to say it to people who are still forming their perceptions. But it doesn’t make it any less true does it?

I’m not saying it’s something you should be proud of but I have to say, it is an art and a fine one at that.

But why do we deceive people? Why do we try to throw a spanner in the works for someone else? Why do we go out of our way to make life misserable for someone else? Why do we become the barriers that stand in their way? Why do we appear to be the solution when we’re actually the problem? Why do we try so fiercely to shape the final outcome just the way we want it?

The answers are simple, yet at times, shocking.

We do it because we revel in the knowledge of knowing we have the power.

Because we’ve been wronged and we don’t want to leave it up to anyone else to fix it.

Because we love like we’ve never loved before and we’re afraid we’ll lose it.

Because we’re threatened by someone who we think can beat us at our own game.

Yes, we deceive each other for a lot of reasons and although our motives maybe clear from the outset, nothing is as it seems till the final step is taken. However, more often than not we do it for one reason and one reason alone.

Because we want something, something precious, something beautiful. Something so fullfilling that we can spend the rest of our lives not wanting anything else. Something complete and something that makes us feel complete.

Something… that belongs to someone else.

pic by deshan tennekoon

When temptation gets too strong, suddenly the dark side is more seductive, more alluring and more than beautiful to think about. So you give in an inch and you’ve lost your morality, you give in some more and you’ve lost yourself. But tragedy strikes once you’ve realized too late, that you’ve also lost your soul…

Will it be too late?

Chatroom – The Rerun, 27th-29th June, 8pm @ the Punchi Theatre, Borella.

Call 2672121 for tickets – all priced at Rs. 350/-

Sponsored by Suntel WOW, TIMTAM, JWT Sri Lanka, Etv & 101.7 TNL Rocks!!!

My new favorite quote:

“give me the ground on which to stand and I will change the world”

Although, I can’t remember where I heard it or read it or who actually said it… Go figure.

B.

Good morning one and all…

A horrible, horrible thing happened yesterday. You all know my friend themissingsandwitch – well last evening, someone hacked into her blog and changed all her passwords so now she can’t even access her email accounts. What’s worse, whoever did it has now put up a post on her blog titled ‘Me, Myself & My Wee Wee’.

I think this is absolutely sick and uncalled for. Just this Sunday our newspapers were talking about the bloggers’ freedom of speech and how it gives us an edge as a community to make our opinions heard. How can we boast freedom when our blogs are now at the mercy of hackers who’ve got personal scores to settle and can’t think of any other way to do it other than through our own blogs.

What message is this sending to people? Are we all suddenly supposed to feel threatened and not say what we want to say because someone else might come along and say things we don’t believe in on behalf of us.

It’s too late to save themissingsandwitch now but it’s not too late to stop this absurd hacker from making posts pretending to be her so I hope someone out there can at least work on deleting her blog. I’ve already alerted the wordpress people but the rest of us shouldn’t take this lying down.

This is a form of violation and I for one will not stand for it.

I’m sick of all the labels and the boxed up metaphors,

Of people pointing fingers at the way I wear my clothes,

You call a spade a spade and then you call a whore a whore,

I know you judge the surface but can you see the core?

My walk, my talk, my style, my class belongs to me alone,

It’s mine to choose and mine to lose and mine to uphold,

The friends I keep, with whom I sleep, your business it is not,

So have your say and make your day and there’s the door, get out!

If I can find it in me to respect your bigotry,

Then I don’t see why you’ve got issues with my history,

I’d like to really take the time and try to sympathize,

But then I wonder why I should if you can’t empathize.

Power of choice, freedom of speech, or so we’d like to boast,

But once the veil comes off you see the hypocritical toast,

He who doesn’t pray does sin and so does he who does,

But which one is more human is the question I must ask.

Smash the barriers break these walls and kill the damn clichés,

I hate the box you’ve put me in; I’m getting out today,

My rights, my wrongs will be decided by my God and me,

So beat it you judgmental freak I’m setting myself free!!!

 Brandon Ingram

Not too long ago my friend themissingsandwitch and I were having this chat about teeange girls who flutter about like the breaking of a nail could cause the end of the world and we came to realize that we couldn’t stand them. Hence, we named them the ‘Butterfly Brigade’! Here’s your personal set of guidelines to identifying a Butterfly Brigadier:

* The ‘I’ve Been Through That Too’ – Syndrome

You could have been born before time to a pack of wolves who later discovered you weren’t their kind and then left you at the doorstep of humans who brought you up to be a mad scientist who’s only goal in life was to take over the world and make it your playground while you stroke the backsides of the playboy bunnies because you were never taught how to get it on……………………….. And they’ve been through the SAME thing!

* The ‘LIKE’ Language

BBiers love using this term before and after every word that comes out of their mouth because they believe they are gifted enough to liken everything to everything else. For example: “I like was like so like happy like because like he like stared like at like me like for like two like seconds like and like I like was like oh like wow!!!”

* The Draaag Factor

Notice this when they speak long sentences, which for most of them is not possible all of the time. They tend to drag their ‘O’ sounds like: “Ooooooooooooooh like my like goooooooooodness, like wasn’t like that like soooooooooooo like cute???”

They also tend to do a similar thing with the ‘S’ sounds: “Thisssssssss like issssssss like what I like wasssssss like sssssssssaying!”

* The Damsel Act

If you’re dancing at a nightclub, it’s rather easy to spot them. They’re the ones in the skimpy tops and the skirts that expose their G-strings, dancing with their legs parted like they’d send a bus through if needed. Now they’ll do this long enough to attract someone’s attention and the minute someone does notice them: “Did you like see that guy??? I was like so violated and shit like by him!!!” Then they run to the boyfriends, who invariably buy their story and that’s when someone gets thrown out.

* The ‘I’m Not Really Listening To You’ Thing

Then there are the times that you feel sorry for them and actually try and have a conversation with them. It feels like it’s going alright until you catch on to the ‘that is soooo true’ thing that they do:

You: Isn’t global warming horrible? / BBier: That is sooo true!

You: I think I should buy a car… / BBier: That is sooo true!

You: My mother thinks you and I should fuck each other / BBier: That is sooo true!

You: You’re such a fake bitch! / BBier: That is sooo true!

Get the drift?

Hope you enjoyed that…

B.

hello people, here is an initial look at what the cover of my book might look like…

what say you?