the black lullaby

I had the strangest experience last night. I got home a little after midnight and settled into bed. I dosed off in the midst of the repeat of Friends on Star World. Then began a dream that I really didn’t want to have.

In my dream I was in the future. From the looks of it, the not-so-distant future. However, the situation I was in was a direct relfection of my past. An unfinished storyline of my life so to speak that was getting closure, but in the most unexpected way.

Here’s the fun part… I didn’t know I was dreaming but I was fully aware of everything that was going on. I felt as though I didn’t belong there and it was almost as though I were in a different plane of existence. Somehow, part of me knew that I had to leave this place and come back to reality, but each time I tried, I found I couldn’t.

It was like each time I tried to wake up, I was being dragged further and further into the dream. I moved through days and time frames in my dream and it was like the story kept on moving ahead and I couldn’t jump out of it even if I wanted to, even though I knew I could. Twisted huh?

The dreams itself was like one of those TV shows on which you’re watching an ongoing track and suddenly you’re fastforwarded to a few months or years later. I knew what I was supposed to say and do but I had no recollection of how I got there.

In the real world, by now I realized that I was dreaming and that I needed to wake up because all other reasons aside, I needed to get to work. But the more I tried the more I found my dream-self fighting with me to stay there.

In the distance I heard a phone ringing… I knew that in the real-world someone was calling me and I knew I had to pick up because the clock in my head was telling me that I was supposed to be up a long time ago. But my dream-self kept getting more and more powerful and started interacting more and more with the other dream characters and having logical conversations with them and laughing with them and crying with them… Believe me, it was more fucked up than it actually sounds right now! I was practially screaming to wake up and I couldn’t.

Finally the second time I heard my phone ring, I felt my dream-self loosening up on the reigns so I took the opportunity and woke up. My driver was outside, getting wet in the rain and had been calling me for almost half an hour. I went to open the door for him and then I just went back to my room and slept for another hour to get over how tired I was…

Whoever said dreams are harmless, was lying!